Honest Prayers

Honest Prayers

I was looking back at some prayers I had written over the last few years, and one of them was simply this:

“Lord, I feel disconnected.”

In what I wrote, I was feeling disconnected yet content all at the same time.

This is odd, isn't it? But I often feel this way.

Basically, I can be content with where the Lord has me while still feeling disconnected from others.

In another prayer, I wrote:

“Lord, open my eyes to what I cannot see. Help me this season. Refresh me, Lord. Fill me, Lord. Point out my waywardness.”

As I was reading over this, I could see that I was feeling a little burned out, but in the midst of it, I didn't recognize that.

Isn't it funny how we can look back on different times in our lives and see where God was with us?

It's refreshing. It's a good reminder that He never leaves us.

Deuteronomy 31:8 reminds us, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

The thought of God going before us can be a hard concept to grasp because we only know the here and now. We may think about things in the future, but we never know exactly what will happen. God, however, knows what lies ahead.

The concept of God going before us is repeated throughout Scripture, and that is something we need to remember.

We can let thoughts about the future, no matter how soon or far off it may be, cause uncertainty and anxiety.

God is not a God of confusion, and He reminds us not to become consumed with tomorrow's worries but to trust Him with today.

Going on trips gives me anxiety.

Not trips with my family, but trips with others or by myself.

I just think about all the what-ifs that could happen along the way. When I do this, I'm focusing more on what could go wrong than on trusting God with what lies ahead.

I sometimes think that if I weren't supposed to go, the door would have closed. And every time I do go, I'm fine.

It's that initial thought of, “Oh boy, I hope I make it home,” that really gets me.

Isn't that what the enemy wants, though?

For my focus to be on the what-ifs and not on what God has for me in the moment.

I found another prayer in my journal that says:

“Thank You, Lord, for a new day. Be with me today, Lord, as I do the work You have for me. Give me wisdom and discernment, for I want to stay on the path You have laid out for me. Today, I pray for making the right moves and wise decisions. I want to live out what I say, and I want to say and do what You have for me. Thank You, Lord, for all You provide. Amen.”

See, I know God is in control, but sometimes I don't remember it, and I have to be reminded.

Here's a reminder from Proverbs 16:3.

 “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”

Be committed!

Commitment... hmmm. We do okay with this, but then again, we don't.

We commit to a lot of things, and some of those commitments come easily. But remembering and following through with committing everything we do to the Lord? That's hard.

It's like we wake up with amnesia some days.

We just prayed yesterday and told God we trusted Him, but we woke up today worried about everything.

Our commitment went right out the window.

This is why we have to be honest in our prayers.

God knows us. He knows what we have done and what we will do, but talking to Him about it isn't redundant. It's what He wants.

He wants us to come to Him in full honesty, even if that means repeating our concerns, praises, and prayers.

When we read the Bible, we see that so many of the people we learn about were honest with God.

They were honest in their conversations, their praise, and their lament.

As we read about them, we can begin to understand how to talk to God. We see how He listens, along with His compassion and understanding.

He does not reject us for coming to Him honestly.

So why aren’t we always honest?

What are we afraid of?

Why do we hold back from our all-knowing Father?

It's our human nature.

Shame, guilt, and judgment can come upon us when we're honest with others, so we learn to hold things tightly.

We don't let others in.

And sometimes we carry that same mindset into our relationship with the Lord because that's what our experiences in this world have taught us.

But Jesus tells us something different in Matthew 11:28–30.

Matthew 11:28-30 - “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Jesus is welcoming us to come to Him as we are.

He's saying that in our weakness and weariness, we can come to Him and find rest. We can learn from Him and trust Him with the burdens we're carrying.

He's inviting us to come to Him with honesty.

With raw emotion.

Don't just come in the good times. Come in the horrible times, the difficult times, the okay times, and even those times when all we want to say is, “I'm fine.”

He already knows what we need.

Don't hold back.

Be honest and bring all of who you are to Him.

Honesty with God is where relationship grows.

That's where we draw close to Him, sitting at His feet and simply saying:

“Lord, I need You. I feel disconnected. I feel lost.”

We don't have to have everything figured out before we come to Him.

We don't have to find the right words or pretend we're doing better than we are.

We just need to come.