Give Grace

Grace

We are often so quick to give others grace, yet so hard on ourselves.

We hold on to mistakes. We replay moments. We have full conversations in our heads. We wish we had done better or said something different. And through all of this, are we giving ourselves the same grace we would give someone else?

Personally, I’m even quicker to forgive others than I am to forgive myself.

Where did we learn this? This isn’t what the Bible teaches, nor is it how Jesus shows us we should live — yet here we are.

This is what Ephesians 4:2-4 says, “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future.”

This scripture seems to lay it out pretty clearly.

Holding on to our mistakes can stunt our growth and our learning. It can also keep us from fully experiencing forgiveness. And holding on to others’ mistakes does the same.

We need to let go by learning, adjusting, and keeping our focus on God. If we carry yesterday’s mistakes into today, we haven’t fully stepped into grace or forgiveness.

God is so gracious. He gives us new grace and mercy every single day.

Lamentations 3:23 – “Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.”

I know that we hold on to things — I’m pretty bad at it myself — but God is working on me every day in this area.

It’s kind of funny, because this is something I talk about often. I tell my kids to be gracious. I encourage others to show grace and not hold on to situations. And yet, I still struggle with it myself.

Let’s talk about grace in the Bible and the examples we see. There are so many — the prodigal son, the woman at the well, Paul, even the criminal on the cross, and more.

But there’s one I want to focus on, and that’s from the very beginning — Adam and Eve.

There was no sin. It didn’t exist until Eve trusted the serpent over God, and then Adam followed, even though he knew better.

They ate the fruit they were told not to, and when God came looking for them, they hid in shame — a feeling they hadn’t even known before. That single act opened their eyes to thoughts and emotions they had never experienced.

But God still came to them.

Genesis 3:11 - “Who told you that you were naked?” the Lord God asked. “Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?”

I picture it like when a child says something unexpected, and as a parent you respond with, “Where did you hear that?” Not because you don’t know, but because you want them to recognize what they’ve done.

As the story continues, they confess what happened, even in their fear. Then comes the consequence.

Genesis 3:14-19 - Then the Lord God said to the serpent,

“Because you have done this, you are cursed more than all animals, domestic and wild. You will crawl on your belly, groveling in the dust as long as you live. And I will cause hostility between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring. He will strike your head, and you will strike his heel.”

Then he said to the woman,

“I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth. And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.”

And to the man he said,

“Since you listened to your wife and ate from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat, the ground is cursed because of you. All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it. It will grow thorns and thistles for you, though you will eat of its grains. By the sweat of your brow will you have food to eat until you return to the ground from which you were made. For you were made from dust, and to dust you will return.”

Then God clothed them and then sent them out of the garden because they really and truly could no longer be trusted.

And yet — even in that — we see God’s grace.

He still cared for them. He still covered them. He still provided for them, even as He sent them out of the garden.

Their punishment could have been immediate death.

When we continue reading through the Old Testament, we see moments where people faced severe consequences for far less.

We are not meant to fully understand God’s grace — we are meant to accept it.

I often find myself wondering why certain things happen for others or even for myself. But I have to shift my perspective away from my own understanding, wants, and expectations, and remember that God is gracious to everyone.

Everyone is on their own journey.

Just because I don’t understand why someone is receiving something — or going through something — doesn’t mean I get to decide what is right or fair. That’s not my role.

My role is to be loving and gracious.

That can be hard, because we only see one side of things — our side. We don’t see the full picture. And because of that, we don’t always understand.

That’s why we have to lean on the Lord’s ways and His understanding, because ours can be flawed. His ways are always good.

This is why we are reminded to be humble, gentle, patient, and gracious with one another — choosing unity and love.

And that includes extending that same grace to ourselves.